Why do so many of us live in Self Guilt?..Who puts us under it?, How do we Allow ourselves to feel it? What do we do to NOT feel it?..
I know everyone in life feels guilty for doing things at some point, But I think moms constantly feel this way?
We Try to do so many things right and yet we let ourselves be under constant pressure to be "the perfect mom".. which we all know there isn't one that exists!
Here are just a few things I have felt guilt about..
* Letting my children watch questionable cartoons, such as Sponge bob, purely so I could have some quietness in the house from screaming boys
* Not breastfeeding Luca.. I fully breastfed Dante' and Dominic, but for whatever reason I just couldn't do it for Luca.. I lost my Milk due to HIGH stress. and Yet I still to this day feel guilty
*trying to Please everyone at during the Holidays, instead of focusing on My own family and our traditions
*Not reading to my children every day since they were babies, so that they would have a Jump start on their reading skills once school began( I'm just thankful my kids are VERY fast learners once they DID start learning in school)!!
*Going "against" the path of society when it comes to my children's health( i.e. No vaccinations).. I got ALOT of Crap from some on this one.. But I wold say this is the ONE thing I think I have Finally mastered NOT feeling Guilt over!!.. I stand firm on our decision..
There is many other things I could list.. But I would be writing a book on them.. But I talk to moms all the time and in the conversations , allot of times I hear them say how guilty they feel for things..
Websters Definition of Guilt is..
A feeling of regret or remorse for having committed some improper act; a recognition of one's own responsibility for doing something wrong. "Depression is often rooted in guilt which has not been dealt with in an appropriate way." "Guilt is a natural and appropriate consequence to a wrong action."
I think Guilt can be a good thing when it means that you change a Wrong in your life.. But Honestly, I think Most of us moms are just trying our best and yet we still feel as though we are not doing things right, whether that guilt comes from family, Friends society, TV, and Even BOOKS!.. yes.. those "self help " books can REALLY make ya feel like a Schmuck..
I am daily trying to MAKE myself NOT feel Guilty on things anymore!..
Im starting my very own.. "GUILT FREE CLUB" of Fellow Blogger buddies....
Who wants to join me??. Whats some things That have been bugging you, that you want to feel Guilt free from?..
3 comments:
Well, I am not a mother so I can't relate nor imagine the pressure of guilt that can be added to everyday life when you become one.
I already feel guilty about things all the time and I'm not even a mom yet! Haha
This was a good blog and I'm sure it ministered to all your mom friends :) It's good to be honest about the things we're going through because most likely the people close to us are going through the same thing and there is nothing like a good support system!!
So, I'll join your "Guilt Free Club"...haha.
Have a great day!!!
Guilt as a mom seems inevitable.
I can resonate with you especially on the breastfeeding issue. I nursed my son till he was a year old and only nursed my daughter the first few months before putting her on Similac. It got to be too hard with working outside the home and having a two year old climbing the walls at home when I would sit down to feed her. I could have stuck it out if I really put my mind and heart into it, but I didn't.
I often feel like I deprived her of breast milk and its nutrients, but also that bonding time with me.
I once let Noah watch The Simpsons while I was trying to change a lightbulb.
Please don't call CYS.
We have yet to experience SpongeBob, but there are so many times when I sit Noah in front of Noggin so I can get things done without him underfoot.
And I let him watch dvds in the van too much.
And I yell too much.
And truth be told, I sometimes forget to brush his teeth with him.
Okay, I'm done.
I think....
Yeah, you can count me in your "guilt free club" too!
I'm like you, I've felt guilty for not reading books to Cayden as much as "other Mothers" do. :( I get tired of feeling guilty for things too. And sometimes people have a way of making you feel like the worst Mom even when you KNOW you're doing the right thing for your kids! Which always bugs me. Like one example: Cayden doesn't eat meat, dairy products etc. and just recently I've had a couple different Moms challenge me on this! After I explain to them all the health benefits of being a child vegetarian (or one at any age for that matter!) they usually let it go, but not w/out giving their 2 cents first!! (i.e. "Oh, well how will he ever fit in with other kids not being allowed to eat real food?!") What the heck? lol..
Yeah, count me in your club for sure!! haha
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